How Not to Remodel: A True Tale

DenchasyfaucetOnce upon a time there was a young man named Ian who lived in a cute house in Culver City. One day, Ian decided to build his dream kitchen. In his mind, there was a butcher-block counter and a sink with a huge faucet and hose sprayer, the better to fill his enormous pasta pots and feed his hordes of friends. But the big, bad butcher-block counter man said No!, don’t put a wood counter near the tall faucet. The counter will get splashed and spotted and you will be sad. Use granite or a solid surface instead. And Ian’s patient wife said the same thing. But Ian’s head was filled with dreams and he would not be deterred from his quest. Later on, after the kitchen remodel was finished and many feasts had been prepared, Ian grew wise and said of the sprayer: “It gets water everywhere!” And he grew very weary of wiping water spots off his counter, and he cried out: “What were we thinking?” But by then it was too late, and his fate was sealed.

Moral: Always listen to your wife and listen to the butcher-block counter guy (or other experts) who probably know more than you.

The End.

(Note: Have you made a remodeling blunder you’d be willing to share with others to help them avoid the same pain? Please email a photo and a confession, with only your first name in case you’re embarrassed, to How Not to Remodel at: Thank you in advance.)