Remodeling tips for Paris Hilton

Marthaafter2_2 MarthabeforeFrom the Bloom Where You Are Planted Incarcerated Dept.:

Next time I go to jail, Martha Stewart will be my role model, not Paris Hilton. Martha took her sentence like a woman. She said: Let’s do this thing. And she got it done.

Maybe Martha’s five months in the slammer were easier to handle than the 46 or 23 or however many days Paris will be there because Martha has what it takes to decorate a cell.

A website called Worth 1000 sponsored a Photoshop contest to explore the many ways Martha might have spiced up a jail cell.

For me, this post is a long time coming. It was back in the mid-1990s when I was writing my "The Way We Live" series for the Santa Barbara News-Press (back in the good old days when it was owned by the New York Times). My editor allowed me free rein, and I had already written about living in a houseboat, a round house and other odd places. I was all set to write about a woman’s recovery house, and I planned to write about gussying up a jail cell when my editor went to live in Europe and her assistant took over. My new editor looked at my lineup of projects and said, "What are you doing?" The halfway house and the jail cell were out, and upscale kitchens with granite and maple were back in.

So, after posting about the possible ways Martha might decorate a jail cell, I feel whole again.

(Images: Worth 1000)